Practical Perfection: Why I don't have any peanut butter

I went to reach for some peanut butter the other morning and realized that I didn't have any on the shelf. I normally keep a jar of peanut butter on the shelf next to me at work so I can use it for breakfast. Over the weekend I normally make pancakes and I make enough to bring for breakfast during the week. Pancakes by themselves don't make you full for very long so I add peanut butter, and keeping a jar of peanut butter at the office is a lot easier than bringing individual little containers of peanut butter to work every day.
But today I had no peanut butter.

No worries. I knew I had one in my car.

Why you ask? Why do I have a back-up jar of peanut butter in my car? Am I that addicted to peanut butter that one second without some is a travesty? Would I someday need a snack on the way home from work? Do I get stranded in snow storms too far away to walk to civilization and have to survive on peanut butter for three days?! (Although that is a good idea to keep in my trunk next to my shovel and sand and jumper cables).
Well the long and short of it is it was because of a boy.
No, random boys I meet aren't worried about my safety in snow storms and tell me stock up on peanut butter. It was for baking.
A boy I know, who I knew in high school (he was my prom date) wanted to meet up again now that we are living in the same city. For reasons too long for this post I will never, ever date this guy (something about him not respecting me and not having the same values). And I've told him this. Extensively. In words like "I will never date you and don't want to see you again." Apparently to him this means he still has a chance and "wants to be friends." Gag. Whatever, maybe he has cute friends. I know his roommate is gorgeous. So when he wanted to hang out at his house and cook dinner I offered to make dessert.
1. It would give me something to do
2. It wouldn't require me sitting on a couch next to him and watching a movie
3. I could leave after dinner with an adequate excuse of having to go to work tomorrow
Being a boy he has absolutely nothing to do with baking. He didn't even have flour. So after work I swung by the grocery store and picked up individual packages of flour and sugar and hersheys kisses and peanut butter (I was making peanut butter blossoms is you couldn't guess). Well he calls after I check out saying that he was stuck at work and wouldn't be able to get to his house for another hour (let alone get dinner started. I'm having visions of my bedtime getting later and later). So I could go sit outside his house for an hour or I could go home.
I chose to go home since it was 100 degrees outside and sitting in a car would be brutal and I really just didn't want to see him or hang out. Once I got home I just left the stuff in the trunk of my car thinking I could keep it there in case he ever wanted to reschedule and I didn't want to bring it all in. Too much effort.
When he did reschedule I decided to make a labor intensive caramel brownie recipe to eat up even more time. This didn't need peanut butter but I just figured I'd leave it in the trunk of my car to have a replacement when the one at my office ran out.
So the other day rolls around, I have no peanut butter, I go down to the car to get the extra jar, and THERE IS NO PEANUT BUTTER! What happened to it?! Where did it go!?!?
Turns out my mother was helping my get groceries out of the back of my trunk a week or so ago, asked me about the fact that there was brown sugar and vanilla in the trunk, and must have taken the peanut butter inside. Thing is she left the flour and vanilla and brown sugar in the car trunk . . .
Whatever. Point is that my mom stole the peanut butter out of my trunk and I had to eat pancakes without peanut butter! Oh the horror.
So I brought the stolen jar to work with me.